


Cross the Line

by messylochness



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Break Up, M/M, Makeup, Mpreg
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-26
Updated: 2019-12-26
Packaged: 2021-02-26 09:07:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,422
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21966901
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/messylochness/pseuds/messylochness
Summary: Jongin never wanted children. Kyungsoo was aware of that. So when the pregnancy test comes back as positive, he’s left with decisions he doesn’t know how to make.
Relationships: Do Kyungsoo | D.O/Kim Jongin | Kai
Comments: 8
Kudos: 240
Collections: #BabyMakingFest2019





	Cross the Line

**Author's Note:**

> Code : BMF333  
> Pairing : Kyungsoo/Jongin  
> Carrier : Kyungsoo  
> Pregnancy : Pre/during pregnancy  
> Babies : Only one
> 
> ***
> 
> Thank you for the moderators for being super patient with me, I'm sorry that it took quite a long time to finish this story. Thank you for my beta VK, you're the best friend I could ever ask for, and thank you to everyone who read this fic, I hope you like it.

"Let's break up." Kyungsoo sipped his water calmly while saying the poisonous words, like it meant nothing to him. His partner choked on a chicken bone, he coughed terribly until his eyes watered. 

"Wait—what? You must be kidding me, right, _jagi_?" He trembled hard. He almost dropped the can of beer that he was yet to open, but he gripped onto it tightly for a support. "Is this a prank? When did you have the time to put the hidden camera if you haven't been here for more than two weeks?"

"Does it look like I'm joking to you, Kim Jongin?" Kyungsoo scoffed. He cleaned his hand with the nearest napkin then stood up. "Finish your dinner, I'll go home before the last bus leaves. And no, I barely make ends meet, I don't have any spare to purchase a fancy camera to prank you."

"Kyungsoo, wait! You're really serious about that? Do you not want to hear what my answer is?"

"I'm breaking up with you and it's final."

"No, I don't want to break up with you." His boyfriend for the last three years grabbed his wrist but Kyungsoo's glare behind the horn-rimmed glasses was more than enough for Jongin to release his grip. Kyungsoo gathered his belongings; his cellphone, jacket and backpack then left the small living room to wear his shoes. His boyfriend followed him close.

"Why, Soo? Please, I at least deserve an explanation. Have I done something wrong? Am I forgetting any important dates again? Is it because I forget to clean my room before you come?"

"Shut up Jongin! You're so noisy, it makes me dizzy." Kyungsoo got into his shoes while tightening his jacket. "Don't forget to clean up your dishes, it stinks. I swear I can smell it from here."

"Kyungsoo, don't leave me," Jongin grabbed both of his shoulders, he was on the verge of crying, and Kyungsoo averted his eyes, he could not bear to see Jongin breaking apart in front of him. "I thought we loved each other? Why are you doing this to me?"

Kyungsoo shrugged, he grabbed the door handle to swing it open. "Maybe because I just don't love you anymore."

"Are you finding someone else?" Jongin shouted. His voice echoed in the almost empty apartment hall. He no longer cared if he would disturb his neighbors. Kyungsoo did not even need to slow down to reply.

"Perhaps."

***

_Three days ago_

The thin stick dropped out of Kyungsoo's shaking hands. He quickly picked another one at the other small cup next to it, and finally checked the last three of it. Five of them showed two red stripes, and the last one, thicker, the most expensive, bigger than the rest, even clearly written the word he feared the most. His stomach clenched and the urge to vomit returned.

He was trembling hard. He tightened his grip on the sink, as if he would fall and shatter into pieces if he lost his hold. Cold sweats started running down his forehead, passing the bridge of his nose and landing on the marble countertop. He must be dreaming. It must be one of his nightmares, and he needed to wake up soon. He pinched his arm, he let out a shriek when it hurt. It wasn't real, right? Sometimes you could get hurt too in your dream. 

Kyungsoo fished his phone out of his slack pocket, he dialed the most recent number at his list, the one that had been bothering him with his lower back pain when he only reached the second trimester of his pregnancy. Fortunately, he didn't need to wait long before Jongdae picked his call.

" _...I told you to move the vase away from the kitchen, because apparently bearing your child suddenly makes me allergic to flowers_!" He let out a small yelp when he realized that was on the phone. He probably didn't remember that he has picked it up. "Oh, hi, Soo! I'm sorry that you have to hear that. Chanyeol just being his dumb self again."

"Hi Dae." Kyungsoo coughed when the bitterness that came from the back of his throat began to spread to his entire mouth. "Are you busy right now? You know, I can call—"

"No, Soo, I'm not. Please give me a second." He put the speaker away but Kyungsoo could still hear his best friend shouting back to his husband. " _Yes, Love, just order every menu that I marked."_

" _But you don't usually eat raw fish_ , _is that really okay with you?_ " Chanyeol argued.

" _It's not for me, you moron! I'm carrying your fucking baby, and it's his wish. Now leave me alone, I need to talk to my best friend!_ " Jongdae cleared his throat before returning to the phone call. "Hi again Soo, sorry to keep you waiting."

"Are you sure you're done there?" 

"Positive!" Jongdae giggled cheerfully. "Now do tell me why are you calling me."

"Do you…" Kyungsoo tended to bite into his nail whenever he was nervous, but he was disappointed to see that there was nothing left to be bitten. "Do you still have the clinic's number?"

"What clinic?" He could hear the slight raise at Jongdae's tone as a sign of curiosity, but deep down they both consciously understand what Kyungsoo want. "Are you…" Kyungsoo nodded his head, but of course his friend could not see him, he responded with a short hum. "No way…" Jongdae shrieked in terror. "You really are? You and Jongin had been very careful—"

"Very." Kyungsoo repeated with certainty. "Not a single session of intercourse without contraception and the constant alarm for birth control pills. Heck, I don't even know how could this happen to me," he sighed. He leaned his back to the shower's glass wall to ease his dizziness. 

"And both of you don't even do that as often as… well, Chanyeol and me." Jongdae nearly lost his voice when he tried to keep his voice as low as possible. "Of course, since we're married, pregnancy doesn't scare us anymore. How long since you found out you're carrying?"

"The symptoms had been showing for the last couple of weeks." The headaches, lack of appetite and the urge to throw up had occurred to him since he just got back from SM Entertainment after signing a contract for his newly composed songs, but Kyungsoo just braced himself to check it today using the test pack after it got worse.

"How many test packs did you use?"

"Five."

“All of them are positive?" Jongdae asked, but the lack of answer also acted as one. "Shit! You're in big trouble, Soo."

"As if I don't realize that either." Kyungsoo sighed. Both of them were surprisingly silent for several minutes, the only sounds heard were their exchanged breathing and sometimes Chanyeol's voice when he talked to the phone. Having a kid out of wedlock was still considered taboo amongst the society, especially if you were a male carrier. It was not like being one already counted as scandalous either, but they were judged by almost everyone; the aunties slutshamed them, the middle-aged men would claim they were wild and indecent, and their same aged friends would bully them for not using protections properly.

Kyungsoo was not ready for the judgement. Not that he was the type to fake his attitude for the sake of keeping his image, but he did not want to disappoint everyone who knew him. Not a single parents in his neighborhood that did not mention his name when they nagged their kids. Study hard like Kyungsoo _hyung_ , have manners like Kyungsoo _oppa_ , lived a serene life like Kyungsoo. He did not want all the adoring eyes they gave him turned into a deathly glare because he got pregnant out of wedlock.

Also, how would his boyfriend react to this news? He was very happy with his new career as one of the choreographer and dance teachers at the prestigious studio where they usually worked with famous idol groups for their comebacks. One day Jongin came to his apartment happily because he choreographed for UN Village, a song that Kyungsoo composed for a RnB soloist rookie Byun Baekhyun. He still had dreams that he wanted to fulfill, and it might even take a longer time for their relationship to settle down and get married. If they could still maintain their relationship until then.

It was not like Jongin loathed kids either. He loved his niece and nephew, but he had mentioned before that he did not want kids of his own. Not yet, not now, not in a few years. He wanted to be the cool uncle who would spoil his niece and nephew rotten with luxury things and take them out for a fancy dinner. Kyungsoo was very aware of how hard Jongin struggled to get into his current position, and he surely did not want to ruin his life with this sudden news.

"I'll text you the address." Jongdae whispered in the softest voice that Kyungsoo had ever heard him use.

"You're not even questioning my decision?" Kyungsoo seemed a little bit shocked with Jongdae's response. His friend chuckled.

"It's your body, Soo. You hold full authority over your body, what you are going to do with it, what you want, and what you don't want to _have_. My job here is to give you all the support that you really need, just like today." Kyungsoo's phone vibrated on his cheek. "Text sent. Call me again whenever you need company, alright?"

The bitterness rose from the back of Kyungsoo's throat, he croaked a short thank you before ending the call and shoving his head back to the basin. He felt nauseated, but this time it did not come from the morning sickness.

***

The girl who sat next to Kyungsoo might not be older than seventeen years of age, based on her look and the way she could not stay still when the anxiety kicked in. She was alone, so did he and the other male carrier who already went under procedure inside the clinic's sterile room. They did not talk much, only a single bow follow with formal greeting before they got busy with their own mind. Her eyes looked swollen, Kyungsoo was almost sure she cried a lot in the several past days, because he would do that too, if Jongdae was not there to comfort him.

Kyungsoo was very sure of his decision when he made the appointment through phone call, or when he got his pre-procedure examination when he just came to this place. But now the determination inside him started to waver. A black and white print out of the embryo's picture was kept inside his pocket as a proof that he did not want to let this little thing go yet. He should have thrown it away immediately after he left the examination room but he could not brace himself to do that.

It was only five weeks old and it looked more like a tadpole than a tiny human as it seen on the sonogram monitor. Kyungsoo should have averted his eyes when the doctor showed him the first sight of his not-so-future future child, but there he was, he could not stop staring in awe at his baby once he saw it. The imagery of a beautiful baby bump under the thick layers of his oversized sweatshirt just like Jongdae's one or a smaller version of both him and Jongin running around at children's playground near his flat, someone who would call him Papa and came to him to ask for comfort. Although changing diapers could be tricky, but he was sure that he would have no difficulty to do that, since he was quite experienced with Seungsoo's first child. And the rest of it had been haunting him for the next hours as he waited for his turn.

Streams of what-if moved rapidly inside Kyungsoo's head and it began to drown him in despair. The wall that he had built slowly crumbled into dust. Shivers ran down his arms as he suddenly feel the urge to cry. It was very unusual for him to get as emotional as this, screw the pregnancy hormones. But he could not contain his overflowing feelings any longer. He grabbed his phone and dialled Jongdae's number. His best friend picked the call immediately as he promised.

"Soo, are you okay?" He was unusually calm for someone who usually loud. Jongdae might be able to sense Kyungsoo's distress, that was probably why he waited for Kyungsoo to talk whenever he was ready.

"Dae, will you scold me if I… you know," Kyungsoo could no longer hide his trembling voice, although he bit harder on his nails. He could hear the heavy sigh from the other side. "I don't want to do this… _termination procedure_ anymore. But please convince me that this is for the best."

"Of course not! I didn't scold you when you want to terminate your pregnancy, I won't do that either if you decided to keep it. A baby can be both disaster or blessing, depends on how we see them. I will be very happy if you starts to see them as the latter." Jongdae sighed. "You're going to be a good father, Soo. I'm very sure of that."

"Will you help me to prepare its arrival?" Kyungsoo was on the verge of crying, but he held the overwhelming sensation inside him by taking several deep breaths. 

"Both Chanyeol and I will fully support you in this path you're going to take. What do you need, spill it to your fairy godfather Dae. A bigger flat than your current studio one? Baby crib? A company to your every appointment?"

Kyungsoo cried shamelessly, he stood and began to walk away while dabbing at his eyes with his sweatshirt's sleeve. "Everything, Dae! But first, help me to break up with Jongin. This is for our own good. For him."

***

Kyungsoo dropped the smallest box on top of the bigger one. His eyes roamed over several boxes that littered his new flat. Chanyeol was lying on his stomach on the floor near his collection of cacti. He must have been very tired after helping Kyungsoo move out of his old place. Jongdae was not allowed to do the hard labour, since he could barely move things with his round belly, so Chanyeol volunteered to help. Jongdae helped by cooking their lunch since Kyungsoo would feel nauseated whenever he caught the scent of food, and he was on the stage where he could not stop eating. 

He moved out of his old place after breaking up with Jongin, so that the younger would not be able to find him again. He never told him the real reason why he broke up with him, but he thought it would be the best for both of them. Jongin still tried to call him and spam his chat, but he ignored all of it. He was thinking about changing his phone number, but all his colleagues and working partners might be unpleasant when they could not contact him. He did not want to be seen as unprofessional because of a mere breakup. He only blocked Jongin's phone number and unfollowed his social media, but that was not enough.

Jongdae returned to the living room while balancing two large bowls of black bean noodles. Kyungsoo helped to place the meals and side dishes on his coffee table as the makeshift dining table, then the three of them had lunch together. Chanyeol seemed very happy with his husband's cooking, he shoved the entire bowl into his mouth while humming dramatically. Kyungsoo shared the second bowl with Jongdae because the portion was a little bit too much for him, and he had been trying to not vomit his food since he decided to keep his baby. 

"You're lucky, you got yourself a great deal with this flat." Jongdae looked around Kyungsoo's empty apartment. "It's even slightly larger than mine and Chanyeol's place, yet you rented it at a lower price than ours."

"Do you want to move here too, _baby_?" Chanyeol asked while wiping his lips with the napkin. 

Jongdae pouted, "But it's so far from your work."

"You know that I won't mind waking up earlier to be able to get to work on time." Chanyeol rubbed Jongdae's cheek with his thumb. "You can spend more time with Kyungsoo if we're going to be a neighbor. It seems like room 2161 is vacant." 

"Later, _daddy_ , we can talk about it later when our Yunho has born." Jongdae shoved his husband's shoulder playfully when he got too close to him. His best friend just broke up with his boyfriend and he did not want to be seen as insensitive, no matter how tough Kyungsoo looked.

"You already decided on their name?" Kyungsoo asked curiously.

"We even already know his gender!" Chanyeol chirped proudly. He quickly covered his mouth when the pronouns slipped out. "Park Yunho. Imagine a little boy with my eyes and Jongdae's lips. A perfect name for him, right?"

Kyungsoo nodded. He stopped chewing his food, his stomach feeling full already. Looking at his shallow expressions, Jongdae draped his arm around Kyungsoo's shoulder.

"Don't worry, we'll help you find the right name for your baby."

"I like Wooyoung," Chanyeol replied enthusiastically while tapping his chin. "Or San, but we decided to choose Yunho since it sounds cuter. With Jongdae as the other father, my expectation to have a cute baby is very high."

"Sewoon," Kyungsoo mumbled. "I like Sewoon. Or Sooyeon."

"That's… also great!" Chanyeol clapped his hand enthusiastically. "You'll be fine, Kyungsoo, we have faith in you. You got us, right, _baby_?" He nudged his husband for approval.

"Yeah, we're here for you."

***

Kyungsoo woke up in the middle of the night, craving something sweet like chocolate chip flavored ice cream that his ex boyfriend liked. Jongdae and Chanyeol slept in the guest room, after helping him move apartments throughout the weekend. Not that Kyungsoo owned a lot of things to begin with, but his body got tired easily nowadays. He could not stand for more than fifteen minutes to glue the new wallpaper without feeling pins and needles in his legs. He draped his comforter over his shoulder then decided to find something to drink. He opened the door carefully, afraid of waking up his friends next door, but his kitchen's light was on, and Jongdae offered him a cup of chamomile tea. 

"Can't sleep?" Kyungsoo asked his best friend. Jongdae shrugged his shoulders.

"Yeah… our Yunho suddenly wants to eat tteokbokki." He smiled. "Do you want something too? I could ask Chanyeol to buy it for you."

Kyungsoo mouth watered, "Can Chanyeol buy me chocolate chip ice cream too? There's a convenience store at the end of this road. Just buy me anything that is cheap." 

Jongdae clapped happily, "Finally, Kyungsoo's first crave! Sure, I'll text him." He grabbed his phone and typed with one hand. 

Kyungsoo hummed softly when he sipped his tea. Jongdae poured himself his second cup after finishing his current one in a big gulp. His phone suddenly rang, Jongdae scrunched his nose when he saw the caller's ID. He rejected the call before Kyungsoo could take a peek of who was it.

"It wasn't from Chanyeol?" Kyungsoo asked him carefully. Jongdae shook his head then continued to drink.

"Chanyeol is probably still driving. He only replied with a thumbs up emoji before." 

The second time Jongdae's phone rang, he stood up and walked to the living room with an apology. Kyungsoo could still hear what he said to the caller no matter how hard he tried to keep it low.

" _I've told you yesterday that I don't know where Kyungsoo is, and even if I did know, I wouldn't want to tell you where he is since he broke up with you anyway… Sorry? I can't hear you. Are you drunk, Jongin? What the fuck!"_

Kyungsoo flinched on his seat at the mention of his ex-boyfriend's name. He had been avoiding the talk about his ex, and Jongdae have been very careful to never mention him at all. He was glad that looking for a new place and packing his things had become the biggest distraction from thinking about the man that he once loved. Now that he was no longer busy, he could not help but think of him again. Sometimes it felt unfair to leave him in the dark when he was struggling to take care of the baby by himself. But it was his decision. Even if Jongin knew about his pregnancy, he was sure he would break up with him anyway.

" _Listen, beanstalk, just because I'm a friend of your ex, doesn't mean I'm your friend too. Go call the fellow beanstalk friend of yours to cure your hangover… I said the fact, Jongin. He's not your boyfriend anymore. Get a hold of yourself. I'm hanging up."_

Jongdae returned to the kitchen with scrunched eyebrows and a frown. Kyungsoo did not dare to ask why and how often his ex-boyfriend bothered him. He was even going to apologise for the inconvenience that Jongin made, but the sound of his front door opening broke the sudden silence between them. Jongdae placed his phone at the table then walked away to welcome his husband. 

Kyungsoo could not tone down his curiosity when he entered Jongdae's wedding date to unlock the screen and Jongin's most recent chats show up on the notification.

**_Beanstalk Kim_ ** _• 2 days ago_

_Jongdae please help me_

_I want to meet him_

_I really loooooveeeee Kyungsoo you know it right_

**_Beanstalk Kim_ ** _• Yesterday_

_I bought kimchi and spaghetti today_

_But I couldn't replicate Kyungsoo's authentic dish_

_Nearly burn my kitchen ㅋㅋㅋ_

**_Beanstalk Kim_ ** _• Today_

_I'm in front of Kyungsoo's place but he moved out already_

_Where is he?_

_Where is my boyfriend?_

_Where did you hide him?_

Kyungsoo hurriedly closed the chat room and repositioned Jongdae's phone the way it was before when his friends returned to the kitchen. He placed a big tub of chocolate flavored ice cream in front of Kyungsoo while opening his own big sized spicy tteokbokki. Chanyeol sat beside his husband, bringing the cutlery that he took out from one of the kitchen drawers. 

"You don't have to buy me this big—" Kyungsoo closed his mouth when Jongdae feed him a piece of the rice cake. His eyes widened when the food tasted great.

"Don't worry, we can share." Jongdae chewed his own food. Chanyeol slumped in his seat, he buried his face at the table while Kyungsoo and Jongdae enjoyed their supper. Jongdae used his clean hand to rub at his husband's head lovingly. 

"He must be really tired," Kyungsoo said.

"Yeah, he always looks tired recently, especially since I'm on my second trimester." Jongdae pouted. "God, how could I end up with him, anyway?"

Kyungsoo laughed at that remark. Chanyeol was a professor at Korean University, department of mathematics. They met when Kyungsoo and Jongdae were invited to sing at their music theory professor daughter's wedding. He fell in love with Jongdae's angelic voice instantly when he sang their first self-composed song, She's Dreaming. Of course, who would not have fallen in love with him, anyway, and he asked him out after the party ended.

They have been dating for several months before Chanyeol get down on his knee, pulling out a diamond ring in the middle of their fancy dinner date, asking for his hand. Jongdae said yes immediately and they kissed right there after Chanyeol put the ring on him. Jongdae managed to finish his study before they got married. Three years later, he carried their first child proudly. 

Kyungsoo wanted to be proud of his baby too. And a loving husband who would do anything for him, just like Chanyeol to Jongdae. But he guessed he could not ask for so much.

He opened his ice cream container and took a spoonful, since Jongdae's tteokbokki was quite spicy. He blinked several times when he felt his eyes water. 

"Are you okay?" Jongdae asked him.

"Just… pregnancy hormones." Kyungsoo laughed at himself for his weird craving.

"It's okay, I understand that pregnancy hormones sometimes suck." Jongdae patted his cheek. "We have each other, Soo. It's just like the old times."

"Yeah." He averted his face to silently dab his eyes with his sleeve. He really wanted to talk about how could Jongdae allow his ex-boyfriend to bother him, but suddenly Jongdae stood up from his seat.

"Have you finished eating?" he asked. Jongdae almost cleared his spicy tteokbokki container. "Let's go back to sleep. I'll clean up."

"No, it's okay, I'll do it. You better wake Chanyeol up, it must be very uncomfortable to sleep in that position." Kyungsoo took the empty dishes with him, replacing the cap of his ice cream and keeping it in the freezer, then he started cleaning. He could not get back to sleep afterwards, so he decided to play with his guitar. Composing a new song never failed to relax him. He fell asleep with a mind full of a sweet melody and a phrase that he was sure would fit the song.

_Now all I do, all I do is wait._

He could not wait to have a talented singer to sing his song. Maybe Byun Baekhyun again.

***

Kyungsoo hated grocery shopping, especially when he could not cook without feeling nauseated, but he needed to eat for two now. He rubbed at his small bump, he was around ten weeks now. The baby started to look like a tiny human baby and he could hear its faint heartbeat too in their recent appointment. Kyungsoo cried when he first heard it, he gripped Jongdae's hand tightly, both of them ended up crying together, making the obstetrician feel slightly awkward around two sobbing pregnant men.

Kyungsoo was about to pick some yogurt when the corner of his eye caught sight of a tall figure clad in all black and head covered with a bucket hat. He hid behind an isle full of cereal and jams. He should not hide, but once again Jongin should not coming up in this area that was quite far from both his place and work. Kyungsoo placed his palm upon his belly unconsciously, it was a newly found habit that he find comforting. He braced himself and came out, perhaps he was already gone by this time. But Kyungsoo was wrong since the man was now stood right in front of him.

" _ Jagi… _ "

Kyungsoo averted his gaze, he could not look at the taller's face that was on the verge of crying. He had been staying away from him for this reason.

"Hi, Jongin. How are you doing?" He put on his best smile, focusing his eyes at the chocolate hazelnut jam behind his head. He would not willingly make eye contact with the taller.

"Terrible." Jongin shook his head. "I miss—"

"Oh, excuse me, I want to take that." He shoved Jongin's shoulder aside to reach the jam, but the younger gripped his wrist.

"I went to your place several times, but your landlord said that you've moved out. Why?"

Kyungsoo shrugged his shoulders, while keep continuing to wriggle his hand out of Jongin's grip. "I found a cheaper place and it's quieter too. Why are you here? Your place and work is almost an hour away."

"I'm visiting Timoteo's older brother. His wife just went into labor." Kyungsoo's lack of reply made Jongin continue to talk. "Where is your new place?"

Kyungsoo scoffed, "I won't tell you."

"Can we talk?" He closed the several inches distance between them in this narrow aisle, cornering the pregnant male.

"I'm sorry, I can't." Kyungsoo faked his smile again. "I'm a bit busy with Baekhyun's upcoming comeback." It was not entirely wrong. The deal that he signed several weeks ago with SM Entertainment was for Baekhyun's solo comeback, although he was not sure when it would be released. "Need to cook dinner before finalizing my demo song."

"Don't lie to me, Soo." Jongin growled. "Baekhyun will have a comeback with EXO this November. I choreographed for their song. He won't have any solo schedule at least for a couple of months."

Kyungsoo chuckled, on another occasion he would be very proud of his ex-boyfriend, might even buy some wine to celebrate with him for his first project with a famous group. But it was too late, wasn't it? They would never get back together.

_ Well, unless… _

But that was impossible, right?

"Silly! You think he would have a comeback at the same time with his group? It's for his next year spring album."

"Oh…"

Silly Jongin. Kyungsoo bit the inside of his cheeks to prevent him from laughing. It was so easy for the younger to believe his lie.

"I gotta go. I hope I won't see you again, Jongin." He turned around, trying to find his escape. It was a wrong move indeed, since it gave Jongin an opportunity to wrap his arms around his waist, engulfed him in a hug. He cursed his pregnancy hormones that suddenly craved for the other man's attention the moment they were touched, because he melted instantaneously within the embrace. 

There was a deafening silent that engulfed both of them. Jongin did not even dare to move his hands away, too scared when he found out the small bump at Kyungsoo's lower stomach. His thumb traced the line where the bump met the flattened area.

" _ Jagi… _ you're—are you—"

"Stop calling me like that, Jongin." Kyungsoo growled. "And, no."

"I haven't even finished my—"

"No."

"Kyungsoo, you're—"

"Whatever you're going to say, it's a no." Kyungsoo removed himself out of Jongin's hold then walked away. "Go home now. You look tired."

He was half running into the checkout line, feeling lucky that he did not have to queue to pay for his groceries. Jongin did not run to follow him, and Kyungsoo somehow feel glad for that. He patted his lower belly softly, it was not that obvious yet, right? He could have mistaken his small bump with a bloated stomach, since he was not fond of working out to begin with, and Jongin knew that too.

But he forgot that Jongin remembered his body shape too well through all the time they spent together. And he noticed even the tiniest change with him.

***

Kyungsoo spent half an hour of his morning to weeping over his favorite black sweater that no longer fit. It was very comfortable to wear and he always used it whenever he needed to leave the house for it never failed to give the perfect illusion that he was not pregnant. Jongdae would be there in a few minutes to pick him up for the prenatal appointment, but he was still topless with the rest of his wardrobe scattered around the bed. He was very upset that he could not find the right clothes that could fit him and would not show his twelve weeks bump in a quick glance, for he was fully aware of other people's judgement around him already.

He was supposed to shop for pregnancy clothes yesterday, but he cancelled the plan right after Jongdae barged inside his room and nagged him why he had not gotten ready. He had not told Jongdae about his meeting with Jongin yet, the sole reason why he refused to leave his house. He was worried that he might have crossed paths again with his ex around the neighborhood. Jongdae offered his old no-longer-fit clothes for him and he would arrive any minute.

He felt relieved when he heard the front door open—he knew Chanyeol and Jongdae did not need to knock on his door since both of them knew his lock code—and he rushed to greet Jongdae who seemed to have trouble balancing several paper bags in a hand. He handed them to the sobbing, topless Kyungsoo, and the latter just picked some random top inside it to wear.

"Feeling better?" Jongdae offered him a box of tissues. Kyungsoo blew his nose while trying to stop his tears.

"Thank you, Dae." Kyungsoo felt awfully weak and he hated it.

They both moved to the living room and occupied the couch. Jongdae pulled out a tuna kimbap and chocolate milk from his other bag and offered it to the younger.

"Here, have some food. I know you still can't cook yet without feeling nauseated so I bought it on my way here." Jongdae placed his legs on top of the coffee table and massaging his ankles. "Please pardon me," he chuckled lightly. "Swollen legs will make you feel tired easily, so you better watch out for its signs, you understand?"

Kyungsoo tore the packaging open and stuffed his cheeks like a hamster. He did not realize that he was hungry until he saw food. Jongdae waited patiently for Kyungsoo to calm down and finish his breakfast. He slowly hummed a nursery song for baby Yunho, a little habit that he did to strengthen his bond with the unborn baby. When his legs were no longer sore, he shuffled to the kitchen to brew his favorite tea. He pulled out his phone to reply to his husband's text that told him that he was on his way to his class. Jongdae sent a cheering sticker as a reply.

He brought two cups of warm tea back to the living room as he sat straighter to face his best friend. Kyungsoo had finished eating the kimbap and he sipped his chocolate milk. 

"You looked scared earlier. What happened?" he asked carefully. He needed to know whatever was bothering Kyungsoo, since he was under his care and he took full responsibility for whatever happened to him.

"Nothing."

"Is there anything that happened recently that you didn't tell me?" Jongdae rephrased his question, he did not seem ready to let this thing go easily, so Kyungsoo gave up. 

"So…" He cleared his throat. "I… met Jongin a couple of weeks ago when I went grocery shopping at the supermarket near here." 

Jongdae widened his eyes, "Aah… That's why you refused to go out with me yesterday?" Kyungsoo nodded. "Did he know what happened to you?"

"He might had guessed it, though." Kyungsoo rubbed his slight bump. "You know, since he's a dancer and he'd been holding my waist quite often, he might have recognized my body change. But I didn't allow him to say anything and ran away as fast as I could."

"That was… close." Jongdae pouted. "But what will you do when he hears that you're pregnant?"

Kyungsoo scoffed, "It's not as if he'll beg for me to accept him again, though. He might be glad that I get rid of him too."

Jongdae sipped his tea slowly. "Let's get to your appointment, we're going to be late."

The ride to the hospital in Jongdae's car was silent, the only sound heard was the low buzz of the radio. Dr. Kim's room was almost deserted when they came since they were late, but the greater part of coming late was he didn't have to face the judging look that were thrown at him from the other patients or their family members. 

Dr. Kim said that the baby looked quite healthy, although the carrier father was a little bit underweight and anemic. It grew according to the normal growth chart and Kyungsoo cradled the black and white copy of the sonogram like it was the most precious thing he ever held. They could not see their gender yet, they might be able to see it next month, and until then, Kyungsoo still could not decide whether to call his baby Sewoon or Sooyeon. Dr. Kim prescribed some supplements to help with his sickness and iron tablets, so that now they were waiting at the pharmacy to get his meds. 

"Soo, will you wait here for a moment? I need to go to the bathroom. Ugh, it must be because of the tea." Jongdae hurriedly excused himself to the nearest bathroom to relieve himself. Kyungsoo sat on the long bench while pulling out his phone. He listened to his demo once again through the earphones, and he wondered if it would sound better if he added some flute instrument at the bridge.

Kyungsoo was not aware of his surroundings when a tall figure stood in front of  him to give the lady behind the counter his prescription s. He lifted his chin and met with a pair of dark eyes.

" _ Jagi… _ "

Kyungsoo hated coincidence, but it seemed like faith really played funny jokes on him. 

"Fancy seeing you again, Jongin." He could taste the bitterness in his own voice. "I didn't expect to see you around in a university hospital."

"I, uh… I hurt my knee, and Taemin brought me here." Taemin was Jongin's boss and he was the founder of the dance studio. Kyungsoo did not need to be introduced to the name that slipped out of Jongin's lips, so he just nodded his head.

"Get well soon… I guess." Kyungsoo unconsciously pulled Jongdae's old sweater lower than his hips to hide his body from the scrutinizing eyes of his ex. And he hoped that it would be enough to trick his hawk eyes. He let out a long sigh when he saw Jongdae came out of the bathroom.  _ Please hurry up _ , he silently chanted.

"What are you doing here? Are you ill?"

Kyungsoo shook his head, he morphed his face as calm as possible. "I'm accompanying Jongdae for his appointment, since his husband is busy."

From Jongdae's view, he could not see Jongin's face, for he was turned away from him, but at least he was aware enough to not blow their cover in front of anyone.

"I swear to God, I loathe the second trimester so much!" he whined from afar. "I keep feeling hungry and couldn't stop eating like a pig, my feet are swollen and I have to pee several times a day it's very frus— oh… hello..." He could see now who the person was—that surprisingly did not register to him as a stranger. "Jongin. Nice to meet you."

"Hi, Jongdae." He greeted Kyungsoo's friend coldly. If Kyungsoo did not know how his ex boyfriend attempted to get his information from his closest friend, he might think that the awkwardness that surrounded the three of them was because he didn't know him well.

"Mr. Do Kyungsoo." The lady called his name. Kyungsoo and Jongdae's eyes met in panic, and the latter hurriedly rushed to her table. 

"No, it's not Do Kyungsoo, it's Kim Jongdae, you might have mistaken me with my friend." He let out a nervous laugh. "Where should I sign?"

The lady looked at him like he just grow a horn. "But…"

"It's okay, I understand. Where are my meds?" He rushed the lady to give Kyungsoo's meds to him and he hoped his round belly would be convincing enough for him to get the prescribed pregnancy supplements. She finally gave up and slid the meds across the table to Jongdae, but Jongin who stood near him grabbed it first. Kyungsoo's eyes widened in fear, he grabbed his meds out of Jongin's hand, and gave it to Jongdae.

"That was very rude of you," he nagged his ex. "Let's go, Dae. Be careful of your steps, please."

"Kyungsoo," Jongin called him. "Why did you need Vitamin B1 and iron tablets?"

Kyungsoo scoffed, "We've told you that it's not for me, you silly."

Jongin strode fast albeit a little bit limping to stand in front of the two. "I read the name on the meds. And I might be a fool, but why would someone who couldn't stop eating like Jongdae needs vitamins for vomiting?"

Several eyes were looking their way and Kyungsoo loathed being the center of attention. They went silent for a moment, before Kyungsoo bravery looked at the taller's eyes.

"If you really want to know the truth, just follow us. Maybe after you hear it you'll stop trying to see me."

Jongin followed the two to the basement parking where Kyungsoo opened the passenger seat of Jongdae's car so that he could rest his legs and he moved several feet away to find a quieter place.

"So, is it right that you're… pregnant?" Jongin asked him carefully. Kyungsoo noticed his hesitance when he mentioned that word that he was scared the most.

"As you can see yourself." Kyungsoo crossed his arms, but it only made his protruding belly more obvious, so he uncrossed it, and averted his eyes. He did not even know why he still wanted to hide anything from his ex after his cover was blown. 

"You left me because you're… carrying… my kid?"

"Because you clearly told me that you didn't want kids." Kyungsoo snapped. He was quite surprised that he did not cry despite being fuelled by his sudden anger. "I'm just doing you a favor, you're welcome." Jongin opened his mouth but Kyungsoo cut him off. 

"And don't you ever tell me to just…" he gestured at his stomach. " _ terminate _ it. I tried, I've even made the appointment, but deep down I can't do that. I don't want to do that. It's my own decision, Jongin, and I totally understand if you don't—"

" _ Jagi… _ " Jongin closed the distance between them, wrapping his arms around Kyungsoo's warm body like how he used to love. He placed his chin at Kyungsoo's shoulder while the other hand caressed his back. 

"I love you. I can't live without you. I'm sorry that I've been spamming Jongdae's phone because he refused to tell me, and you know how persistent your best friend can be. But I—" Jongin landed several kisses upon Kyungsoo's exposed neck. "I'll go through anything with you, Soo. You don't have to face this by yourself anymore. I—I'm here." 

"You're going to accept this… baby?" Kyungsoo almost choked when he said that. "That easy?"

He was quite surprised that Jongin did not get angry or throw some profanities at him. He felt like all the effort and space that he gave to separate himself and his ex-boyfriend was not worth it at all.

Jongin tried to laugh in between the tears, "It's already here, right. And partly it was because of me too that you have to carry the baby. I'll try to be a good parent for the baby and be your partner as long as you're willing to accept me back."

Their eyes met, Kyungsoo's widened and Jongin's were tear-filled. It was too good to be true. Kyungsoo still could not believe it was not a dream.

"Make me believe, Jongin. I need to see your sincerity." He released himself from Jongin's grip and walk back to Jongdae's car. 

"You okay?" His friend asked. Kyungsoo just nodded his head.

"Let's go back to my place, I want to take a nap."

***

Jongin promised to take him out for dinner, and Kyungsoo wasn't ready for that. He wore one of Jongdae's pregnancy clothes, grey sweater that felt super soft in his skin and black pregnancy slacks that snug his bump nicely. He had not tell Jongin his new place yet, they were just going to meet at the restaurant like an ordinary dinner date.

The taxi ride felt slightly nostalgic, it reminisced him of the first time he met Jongin. He was a broke ballet student, and Kyungsoo was just a fresh graduate musicians who struggled to write his first composition. He was the designated driver for Jongdae's bachelor party, while the rest of his friends got wasted out at their table. He was not even tipsy, but he drunkenly grinded his ass at the finest boy that he saw on the dance floor. They made out behind closed bathroom stall before Jongin vomited right at Kyungsoo's clothes. He hurriedly apologize, he even blindly undressed the smaller's shirt and replace it with his own sweater as an apology. They exchanged numbers so that he could return his clothes. On their first date, Jongin awkwardly asked him out and he agreed because sober Jongin looked cuter than drunk Jongin.

Jongin waited for him outside of the restaurant, he even help opened his door. He dressed up nicely in a pair of white button down, grey slacks and long brown coat. Kyungsoo felt like he was underdressed, but the taller tugged at his wrist to their reserved table. He hummed appreciatively at Jongin's upgraded version of their fast food restaurant first date. He ordered his favorite spaghetti and tried to avoid any seafood, which Jongin noticed too and he switched his seafood pasta to black pepper beef.

"So… how far along are you?" Jongin asked him.

"Twelve to thirteen weeks." Kyungsoo sipped his water. Jongin nodded his head.

"Do you bring the sonogram?" He leaned on his elbows, the glint in his eyes seemed genuine, so Kyungsoo opened his backpack to reveal a small album containing three prints of sonogram so far that he had collected during the appointment with dr. Kim. Jongin flipped the album with the same excitement, watching the little one morphed from a tiny tadpole shape into a recognizable small human. "I still can't believe that we really made it."

"Maybe you'll believe it when my stomach got as big as Jongdae's." Kyungsoo snorted. "Are you still mad with me,?" 

"For breaking up with me? Yeah. I'm beyond mad." Jongin returned the album to Kyungsoo. "But the fact that you would rather keep it for yourself, makes me a little bit… sad. Listen, Soo, I might not want to have a child, yet. I might have said it before, when we were still together. We're still young—"

"You are the young one here." Kyungsoo interrupted him.

"Yeah… I might be younger than you, but that's not what I mean." Their food came and he stopped the talk to thank their waiter. "Being an uncle and a father is two different things."

"As an uncle myself, I know it too." Kyungsoo picked his fork to moved his pasta around. His appetite was long gone even before the food was served. He changed his mind, he craved for something spicy and he eyed Jongin's food.

"Wanna switch our plate?" Jongin offered his. Kyungsoo shyly took it while giving back his untouched food. "I really mean it when I say that I might not ready to be a father, but that doesn't mean I won't learn to be one."

"How about your dreams?" Kyungsoo hummed, he liked the seasoning, it suits his taste buds. "Accepting the kids might ruined your dreams in the future."

"And as far as I remember, you have your own dreams too. Please don't make me feel selfish if you're the only one who would sacrifice your dreams to raise the baby by yourself. You need to write several more songs for Baekhyun." He winked playfully. "On our most recent met, I asked him about the solo album progress, and he said he still needed more songs that suits his genre." 

Kyungsoo smiled, "I've had several songs ready, but the company said they might use it for EXO's winter album."

Jongin leaned forward to rub the corner of Kyungsoo's lips with his napkin. "Did you know why I approved Taemin's offer when I have a more prestigious offer from one of the ballet companies?"

"I never heard about the offer. I thought you loved ballet more than me?" Kyungsoo mumbled.

"I love you more than ballet, Soo. The sole reason why I want to work with idol groups is I know that you composed some of their songs, so I thought that it would be nice for me to choreographed a dance to your song. We would be a perfect match, we completed each other."

Kyungsoo choked on a big piece of beef that he had yet finished chewing and it got stuck at his throat. His eyes widened in panic, it made Jongin stood up from his seat and he rounded his arms around Kyungsoo's chest. He was about to do some Heimlich maneuver at him, but Kyungsoo fortunately was able to spit the piece of meat even before the first push. 

"Are you okay?" Jongin asked him. He smelled so good. Kyungsoo unconsciously leaned back at Jongin's shoulder while heaved a long sigh.

"I'm fine, just a little dizzy." He closed his eyes while pinching the bridge of his nose. He suddenly feel drained both emotionally and physically. He just wanted to curled under his comforter and just sleep.

"Do you want to go home? I can take you to my place if you're uncomfortable to show me your new place. Don't worry, I won't do anything that would make you feel uncomfortable, though."

Kyungsoo nodded weakly. Jongin hurriedly paid their bills and led him inside of a taxi to his place, his thick coat draped around the smaller's shoulders. He fell asleep inside of the car and woke up in a familiar bed. He saw a glass of water at the bedside and he drank it. Jongin returned to the room while bringing a wet towel and the other hand gripping his phone.

"Hey, you're up." He sat beside Kyungsoo while placing the warm towel above his forehead. It was surprisingly feel comfortable and slightly made him feel better. "I was worried, I'm about to call Jongdae to..."

Kyungsoo shook his head while pulling up the comforter. "Please don't tell him. I don't want to make his worry."

"Okay…" Jongin watched him awkwardly. "Do you want to talk to your doctor, at least? You looked pale. Did it happen very often?"

"No, just this once." He could see how trembling Jongin's fingers and he grabbed it, gave a gentle squeeze. "Don't worry, maybe I was just shocked. But I'll go see dr. Kim tomorrow morning to make sure that I'm fine."

"Good." Jongin nodded, squeezed his hand in return. "You can have the bed, I'll be sleeping on the couch. Goodnight, Soo."

Kyungsoo hummed softly. "Night, Jongin."

Dr. Kim said Kyungsoo was fine, just a little anemic and low blood levels. He suggested him to took a bedrest, eat more food and don't stress too much. Jongin who was there with him this time since Kyungsoo did not want to go alone. He listened to the doctor enthusiastically, he asked several questions and took a mental note. Kyungsoo was lucky dr. Kim did not ask about their status, since it was his first time to met Jongin. Perhaps he noticed how uncomfortable Kyungsoo was when they were first met and he did not want to make things became awkward. When the appointment was done, Jongin drove Kyungsoo to his place and the smaller invited him in.

"It's a nice place," Jongin said, when they were already inside. 

"Yeah, it is. Do you want some tea?"

"Don't worry about me, I might not be long, since I have to go to the studio this noon."

"Oh…" Kyungsoo could not hide the disappointment in his voice. "Okay. You should go."

"Can I be here for dinner? I might not be a good cook, but I can bring some takeouts?"

"It sounds like a plan." 

"Take care of yourself, Soo, and please contact Jongdae if something happened to you." He smiled, awkwardly patted Kyungsoo's forearm. "Can I hug you?"

Kyungsoo pulled the front of his denim jacket and wrapped his arms around Jongin's neck. The taller returned the hug immediately. 

"Please return sooner," Kyungsoo whined. He did not even know why he was so clingy, but he really needed a company right now and he would take whatever Jongin was offering to him shamelessly.

"I will. Take care of yourself while I'm away."

***

Kyungsoo woke up in the middle of night feeling cold. He went to the kitchen to made some warm tea, when he saw Jongin's feet dangling from the couch because apparently he was too tall. Kyungsoo nudged the younger to woke him up. He has been sleeping at his place for a couple of weeks now. He insisted to be a supportive partner for Kyungsoo and he could not say no either. Jongdae's due was less than a couple of month away and he could not visit him as often as before.

"Jongin," Kyungsoo shook his shoulder a little bit too hard to wake him. Jongin suddenly sat straight as he woke up.

"What happened? Do you need something?"

"Why don't you sleep in the guest room?" Kyungsoo asked him curiously. Unlike Jongin's place who only have one bedroom, Kyungsoo's new place got two bedrooms and he allowed Jongin to occupy the vacant room, since he did not plan to turn the room into a nursery. He might place the baby crib beside his bed since it would be easier and less lonely.

"I fell asleep when I read some books." He grinned sheepishly. There was a few parenting and pregnancy books that scattered around the coffee table messily. Jongin brought them all since he wanted to catch-up what he missed quickly. 

"It's uncomfortable to sleep on the couch." Kyungsoo's kettle whistled, signing that his water has boiling. "I want to make a tea, do you want some?"

"Yes, please."

They sat at the stool side by side while blowing their own cup of hot tea. From the corner of his eye, Kyungsoo knew that Jongin had been eyeing him closely.

"Don't do that." He warned the younger.

"I'm sorry, I can't help." He chuckled nervously.

"You can touch it though. Although we might not be able to feel it's kick yet." 

Jongin placed his mug and he put both hands at Kyungsoo's belly. It was warm from the tea and Kyungsoo appreciated it, since he was a little bit cold.

"Do you prefer a boy or a girl?" He asked him curiously. Jongin who did not anticipate the question looked slightly taken aback.

"I'm okay with both genders. I'll love them all the same."

Kyungsoo hummed, "Funny, but deep down, I wish for a son."

"Why?"

"I… don't know. But I feel like I want to have a smaller version of you, so that I could remember your face in a different way."

"But you have me now, Soo." Jongin seemed a little bit sad, and honestly he did not know what to do to comfort him so he did not say anything more. Jongin slowly removed his hands of Kyungsoo's bump as he sipped his tea. It tasted a little bit bitter at the back of his tongue, maybe he should add a little bit more honey.

***

Kyungsoo was in the middle of hanging his freshly washed laundry when his phone rang. It was from Chanyeol, Jongdae's water broke a few minutes ago and he was in a taxi with the pregnant man to the hospital. Kyungsoo said he would be there too and he blindly grabbed for his wallet and coat. He texted Jongin when he was seated inside the taxi, and the younger responded to his message an hour later after his teaching finished. 

Chanyeol looked pale and about to faint when he saw how hard Jongdae struggled and he was clearly in pain. He kept whispering he would not have another kid, for he did not want to make his husband suffered again while gripping his hand tightly. Kyungsoo held Jongdae's other hand, he wiped his sweat and supported him to push harder when the contractions hit.

Park Yunho born healthily, he cried loudly when he came. Jongdae cried when he first saw his baby, and Kyungsoo swore he was the most beautiful baby that he ever saw. Chanyeol was trembling hard when he held Yunho's small hand, it was so tiny compared to his giant one. Yunho sucked Jongdae's swollen chest happily when his papa learned to babyfed him for the first time. Mama Park and Yoora _noona_ cried tears of joy when they held Yunho for the first time. He was so tiny, yet he possessed a huge power to make everyone fell in love with him at first sight. Kyungsoo slowly backed away from the happy family reunion and he noticed Jongin sat at one of the benches outside of the delivery room. He took the empty seat beside him.

"Are you okay?" They both asked the question at the same time. Jongin chuckled he decided to answer Kyungsoo's question first.

"I'm a bit terrified when I heard how painful Jongdae's scream when he went into labor." Jongin sighed. "Are you going to be okay? It didn't traumatize you?"

Kyungsoo shrugged his shoulders, "Will you be there for me?"

"Of course, Soo."

"Then I'll be fine."

Jongin reached Kyungsoo's hand, and squeezed it lightly. 

"You will be fine." He repeated it like a charm.

***

Kyungsoo woke up in the middle of the night because he felt it. The kick. Sewoon's first kick. On their most recent appointment, dr. Kim said that the baby was a boy, and so they began to call him Sewoon. He was quite a healthy boy, and Kyungsoo could not be more proud of himself for raising him well.

Kyungsoo placed his palm above the spot and waited for another. He could not tone down his excitement and he ran out into the guest room. He shook Jongin harshly to wake him.

"What happened Soo? Are you hungry?" He asked him sleepily while trying to sat straight.

"Here, feel it." Kyungsoo straddled his lap, he pulled Jongin's palm and placed them on his belly. Jongin froze when Sewoon kicked again. Their baby seemed very active at night and it was really not a good sign. But who cared? It was his first kick. Jongin lowered his head and kissed the same spot all over again. 

"I love you, Sewoon." Jongin could feel his eyes watered. "Dad love you so much, little angel."

"We love him," Kyungsoo corrected him, his beautiful heart shaped lips tucked widely to form a dazzling smile, it tugged Jongin's heart.

"We love you." He repeated.

***

Jongdae looked like a walking corpse when he opened Kyungsoo's front door, carrying Yunho in one arm and the diaper bag in the other hand. Kyungsoo came out of the kitchen bringing a bowl of chicken soup for the tired man.

"You looked like a zombie." Kyungsoo chuckled, he cooed at Yunho who stirred awake from his nap. He held the baby so that his papa could eat properly. 

"Yunho keep me awake all night." Jongdae sipped at his soup. "I see now that you can overcome your cooking sickness."

Kyungsoo rolled his eyes, "I have to, since I got tired of Jongin's takeout foods and I don't have you around to cook me homemade food."

Jongdae huffed, "Yeah, I can see how you and Jongin get back together well enough. At least you have someone around when I can't be with you. Did he practically lived here?"

Kyungsoo shook his head, "He come here every night but he left earlier in the morning."

Jongdae finished his soup and he leaned at the couch, his eyelids heavy. "I'll sleep for a couple of hours, please take care of Yunho for me."

"You can have my bed," Kyungsoo nudged his friend. "Jongin didn't sleep there… if it will make you more comfortable."

But Jongdae was too tired to talk about that as he shuffled into Kyungsoo's room to sleep. Kyungsoo brought Yunho to the guest room and cuddled the baby. He hummed a nursery song for Yunho just like how Jongdae used to do to the infant and he slowly drifted off to sleep.

Kyungsoo woke up when Yunho stirred uncomfortably and he thought that it was time to change his diaper. It was nearly midday, and Jongdae still sleep heavily when Kyungsoo finished changing Yunho's diaper and feed him Jongdae's bottled breast milk. He placed the baby beside his papa and lay on the other side so that Yunho was securely tucked in the middle. He noticed that Yunho got Chanyeol's eyes and Jongdae's lips when he saw them closely.

"Did he bothered you?" Jongdae mumbled in his sleep. He might have been awake since Kyungsoo came into the room but he still sleepy.

"No," Kyungsoo chuckled. "I changed his diaper and feed him before he cried."

Jongdae sighed heavily, "You seemed like a better father than me."

Kyungsoo pouted, "You're the best father for Yunho, Dae."

"Yeah… I hope so. But I won't mind either if Yunho got more attached to his Kyungie-samchoon though."

"I hope Sewoon wouldn't be jealous of that," Kyungsoo chuckled.

"So…" Jongdae opened an eye to look at his best friend. "You don't sleep with Jongin. May I know why?"

Kyungsoo averted his eyes, Yunho moved on his sleep, and he use the chance to tucked the baby under the comforter.

"I don't know." He replied after making sure that Yunho would not awake. "I don't think I can trust him… like how we used to do before the break up. And sharing the bed feel very awkward, since every time we did that it usually ended to…"

"I know." Jongdae was fully awake now and he leaned on his elbow. "Do you want to stay away from him when Sewoon had born?"

"Jongin said Sewoon could bear my name, he just wanted to be included in the picture."

"How about you? Do you want things to get back to how you and Jongin used to be?" Kyungsoo did not answered but Jongdae knew him more than anyone else. "You can always start it with a nice cuddle. It could warm you better, strengthen the bond between you and Jongin, and it felt more comfortable when your baby bump got bigger. But it's okay if you don't want to do that yet, though."

Kyungsoo pretended he could not hear him when he landed small pecks at Yunho's mochi cheeks.

***

Jongin was sitting on the carpeted floor while he focussed his eyes on the video that was played on his laptop. It showed his students dance performance and he eyed every single one of them meticulously. He jotted down some notes on his clipboard once he clicked the pause button. He was evaluating them carefully, since the kids were soon going to graduate and half of them would probably continuing to a prestigious dance school, so he had to make sure that everyone was doing their best.

He could feel a presence behind him and he quickly whipped his head. Kyungsoo was still awake at this hour, and he wondered why.

"I'm sorry, am I disturbing you?" He muted the sounds of his laptop. "I forget to bring my headphones, but I needed to make sure that their move—"

"Jongin."

"Yes, Soo?"

"Want to cuddle with me?" Kyungsoo blurted it out then he averted his eyes when he felt his cheeks gotten hot. 

"Are you cold?" Jongin stood up and wrapped his hands around Kyungsoo's shoulder. "You can have the extra comforter in my—"

"I want to sleep with you." He made himself clear. "Do you want to?"

Jongin cupped Kyungsoo's cheeks with both his palms. "Yes."

***

Kyungsoo slept better whenever he had Jongin with him. He loved the extra warmth that he provided, his sturdy chest to leaned on when he spooned him from behind, and Sewoon got calmer when he felt his Dad's presence. His sleeping pattern got better since he could rest well at night, so that he could cook breakfast for both of them, and finished arranging a couple of songs for Baekhyun in a few weeks. 

Jongdae still crashing at his place sometimes whenever he needed help to take care of Yunho while he caught all the sleep that he needed. Chanyeol dropped him off before work and picked him when his classes had finished since most of the time he was too tired to even drive by himself. Sometimes on his day off Chanyeol went fishing with Jongin and he brought Yunho along, while Jongdae and Kyungsoo enjoyed their day. Kyungsoo's baby bumps had gotten bigger and he felt tired easily. His due date was in the next months but he felt like he was going to burst soon.

"Dae," Kyungsoo nudged his sleeping best friend beside him. He hummed softly as a sign that he was listening. "Jongin talking about marriage last week."

"Did he proposed to you?"

Kyungsoo shrugged, "He just casually asked me if I'm going to reject his marriage proposal or not."

"And what is your answer?"

"I don't say anything."

Jongdae huffed, "If he knew you better, he would still proposing to you."

"Why are you so sure that I won't reject him?" Kyungsoo kicked Jongdae's leg playfully. His friend laughed.

"Because you're blushing profusely like a teenager in love." Jongdae poked his cheek. And Kyungsoo did not deny it, he could never deny a Kim Jongdae. He knew him better than himself ever since they were still a toddler.

***

Kyungsoo was really nervous when Jongin took him out to a park near his place. They rarely went out together beside the doctor appointment, and it really made him feel slightly anxious. He had been keeping himself inside of his unit for a pretty long time, he was too scared to socializing with his neighbors, for he did not want to be judged by them. 

"Are you ready, Soo?" Jongin asked him outside of his bedroom. Kyungsoo hurriedly grabbed his coat and came out. 

"Yeah, I'm ready."

Jongin took his hand and they walked outside. The park was less than ten minutes walk from his apartment building, but Kyungsoo was busy fidgeting with his coat to cover his round belly. Jongin stopped to face him and held his hands tightly.

"Stop doing that, please," he hid both Kyungsoo's hands inside his coat pocket. "You're making me uncomfortable too."

"Sorry, I don't think I can make it to the park." Kyungsoo mumbled.

"What scared you?"

"Everyone."

"Why?"

Kyungsoo averted his eyes, "For having a kid out of wedlock," he mumbled. 

"If I…" Jongin let go of his hand and he got down on a knee in the middle of the pedestrian. "Asked you to marry me, will it makes you less anxious?"

"Jongin!" Kyungsoo hit his shoulder. "Stand up now!"

Jongin pulled out a velvet box inside of his pocket and opened it in front of Kyungsoo. "Marry me, _Jagi_. I'm sorry that the diamond might not be as big as Jongdae's wedding ring, and I might not have enough money to hold a proper wedding part—"

Kyungsoo looked around, some people who passed by began to look at their way and he was about to cry because of the attention. He loathed it and he had no other choice but to answer quickly.

"Yes, I'll marry you, now stand up." He grabbed the ring, put it on his ring fingers and pulled Jongin's shoulder to stand up. The younger laughed at his antics.

You're not a romantic person," he pouted but Kyungsoo pulled his face to land a peck on the lips.

"Happy now?"

"Ecstatic!"

"Where is the paper? I'll sign it."

***

Kim Sewoon was born a week earlier before his due date and he made his Dad went berserk, for he was still in the middle of choreographing for Betcha when Kyungsoo called and Byun Baekhyun who had just come to the studio got panicked too. The idol congratulated him and he promised to visit his husband later at the hospital. Jongdae droved the pale Kyungsoo to the hospital because he was not expecting his baby to be delivered earlier and he had not prepared anything yet. 

Jongin could not stop cursing the traffic light and he was close to jumped out of his window to run the last few hundred meters to the hospital and abandoned his car. Fortunately he came right before Kyungsoo's contractions became worse and he could fulfill his promise to his husband.

Kyungsoo changed his mind about Yunho when he saw Sewoon for the first time. He was indeed the most beautiful baby that he ever saw and he cried hard while kissing the top of his head.

"Welcome to the world Kim Sewoon." His eyes met with Jongin and the younger man was sobbing ugly tears. "We love you."


End file.
